It’s a known fact that addiction shatters trust. It leaves behind wounds not just in our own lives, but in the lives of those we love the most… especially our children. When recovery begins, many of us feel ready to make things right, but we quickly learn that forgiveness may come faster than trust.
So how do you regain the trust of your children, your family, and those who stood by in your darkest hours?
The truth is: you can’t demand trust… you earn it back through consistent, Spirit-led Biblical living. And it takes time, humility, and honesty.
1. Start With Honest Repentance
“He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13, NKJV)
Trust cannot grow in the soil of denial. You must first acknowledge the wrongs… not with excuses, but with deep repentance. Your children, no matter their age, need to hear the truth from you.
Coaching Questions to Answer and Journal:
How have I fully owned my past mistakes with no excuses or blame-shifting?
With empathy, how can I go to my children and confess what I did and how it hurt them?
In what ways am I seeking forgiveness, and not merely trying to feel better about myself?
2. Live Transparently—Let Them See the Change
“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 5:16 NKJV)
Words alone will not rebuild trust. Your life must become the proof of your transformation. Children watch more than they listen. Let your recovery be something they see daily: in how you handle stress, how you speak, how you serve, how you stay sober.
Coaching Questions to Answer and Journal:
What do my actions today say about my commitment to change?
How am I inviting accountability into my life and living without secrets?
What might my child might say about my being the same person at home that I claim to be in public?
3. Be Patient—Let Trust Take Root Over Time
“Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of him who prospers in his way…” (Psalm 37:7 NKJV)
You may feel frustrated that your family doesn’t trust you yet. Just know that trust is not built overnight. Just as your addiction wore down their faith in you little by little, trust must be rebuilt and earned moment by moment.
Coaching Questions: to Answer and Journal
How am I trying to rush my healing process?
In what ways can I show patience when my children are still guarded?
Am I more concerned about being trusted or being trustworthy, and why?
4. Show Up Consistently—No Matter What
“Moreover it is required in stewards that one be found faithful.” (1 Corinthians 4:2 NKJV)
Faithfulness is the currency of trust. Be there. Always keep your word. Let your kids see that you now finish what you start. That you show up when you say you will. That you’re steady, not erratic.
Coaching Questions to Answer and Journal:
Where in my life am I inconsistent?
What’s one step I can take today to demonstrate reliability to my children?
How can I become someone known to follow through every time?
5. Allow Christ to Be the Center of Your Change
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.”(2 Corinthians 5:17 NKJV)
You will fall short sometimes. But when your life is truly surrendered to Jesus, your children will see a new person over time. Let them know that this transformation isn’t self-help… it’s Christ in you.
Coaching Questions to Answer and Journal:
In my staying clean, what part is Jesus playing and what part is my still trying to lean on my own strength playing?
In what ways can I model grace, humility, and repentance for my kids every day?
How might I invite my children to see God’s work in my life?
Encouragement
Rebuilding trust with your children after addiction is a sacred journey. It won’t happen by force or through guilt. It happens in the quiet daily choices to live a surrendered life to Christ.
God can restore what was broken. He is not only the Redeemer of your soul, but also the Restorer of your family. As you keep walking in the light, trust God that it will begin to bloom again.
“And I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten…” (Joel 2:25 NKJV)
Have a blessed rest of your day being consistent, intentional, and submitted to Jesus!
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