Where Is God When I’m Hurting So Desperately?

There are moments in life when the pain feels unbearable! There are moments when grief, loss, disappointment, frustration, sadness, or the crushing weight of betrayal seems too much to carry. In these moments, even believers can find themselves asking: Where is God now? Why doesn’t He stop this pain? Why do I feel so alone?

I want to remind you of the truth. You’re not alone, even if it feels that way. God is closer than your next breath. The Bible doesn’t ignore human suffering. In fact, it gives voice to our pain and offers us His comfort. One of the most powerful promises we can cling to is found in Psalm 34:18, which says, “The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit.” Jesus draws especially close to the brokenhearted. He doesn’t recoil from your pain… He steps into it with you.

When Jesus walked the earth, He was called “a Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief” (Isaiah 53:3). He knows what it is to be rejected, misunderstood, and abandoned. He cried. He grieved. He bled. Our God and our Savior does not stand far off from your suffering. He understands it intimately.

Sometimes, in the darkness, it feels like our prayers hit the ceiling. But God hears every single one. Psalm 56:8 reveals something incredibly tender: “You number my wanderings; put my tears into Your bottle; are they not in Your book?” Every tear you cry is noticed and saved by the God who loves you. They are not wasted, unseen, or lost… they are remembered, counted, kept, and treasured.

Even when we can’t see how, God is at work in the pain. Romans 8:28 reminds us, “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” This doesn’t mean everything that happens is good. It means that God is powerful enough to weave even the worst moments into something beautiful, healing, and redemptive. Sometimes we don’t see the purpose until much later; other times we do. Sometimes we won’t understand it on this side of Heaven. We are called to trust the One who sees the whole picture… the First and the Last.

When the pain is overwhelming, don’t run from God—run to Him. Pour out your heart like David did in the Psalms. Cry, yell if you must, but keep talking to your Abba Father. Psalm 62:8 encourages us: “Trust in Him at all times, you people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah.” He can wants to see your honest emotions, answer your questions, and protect you by walking alongside you in your pain.

When you’re too weak to hold on, know that He is holding you. Deuteronomy 33:27 gives us this assurance: “The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms…” You may feel like you’re falling—but you’re falling into grace. Into arms that never let go.

You either believe everything in the Bible, or you believe nothing! These are the times when the rubber hits the road.

God may not always remove the pain, but He will walk alongside you through it. One day, “He will wipe every tear from your eyes” forever. Until then, hold on. Pray. Seek Him. Breathe. Cry if you need to. Just don’t give up. The One who loves you most is right there, even if you can’t feel Him. He hasn’t abandoned you. He never will.

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Reflect & Journal: Finding God in the Pain

In your walk with Jesus, and during your recovery, emotional pain often surfaces raw and relentless. But it’s in these vulnerable moments that we are invited into a deeper walk with God… a relationship not built on performance, but on honest surrender and submission. Journaling can help untangle the knots inside and bring truth to the surface. I’m a huge fan of journaling and require it from my clients if they want to work with me.

Use the questions below to slow down, breathe, and listen… not just to your pain, but to the voice of the One who still calls you His beloved.

Reflective Coaching Questions for Your Journaling:

1. What am I feeling right now that I haven’t yet admitted to God or myself?
   • (Be honest. God wants your full truth.)
2. When have I felt most alone in my pain? What did I believe about God in that moment?
   • (Does that belief align with Scripture? Why or why not?)
3. Read Psalm 34:18 again. What does it mean to me that God is “near” to the brokenhearted?
   • (What could Jesus be doing as He sits with me in this pain?)
4. What do I need from God right now?
   • (Comfort? Clarity? Strength? Write it out as a prayer and pray it.)
5. Am I trying to numb or escape my pain in unhealthy ways?
   • (What would it look like to bring it into God’s presence and release is to Him?)
6. How has God shown up for me in the past… even in small ways?
   • (List at least 3 times where He met you in difficult seasons of your life.)
7. What truth from today’s Scriptures do I most need to hold onto this week?
   • (Write it out and keep it visible. Put it in your pocket. Speak it aloud when you feel overwhelmed.)

Remember, healing is not always fast or easy; however, you don’t have to do it alone. God is with you in every broken step, in each tear you cry, and in those unbearable moments. Your recovery coach can be of great help to talk, work through this with you, and stand in the gap.

Have a blessed rest of your day knowing Jesus will NEVER leave you or forsake you… not today, not tomorrow, not ever! Rest in Him.